Equal parts “Star Search” and “The Gong Show,” “Karaoke Showcase” premiered this month on some 100 stations. The series’ contestants were culled from 3,000 audition tapes, most of which, unfortunately, featured balladeers warbling either “The Greatest Love of All” or " Unchained Melody." Sayonara, balladeers. “We want lively acts that evoke an audience reaction,” says executive producer Len DePanicis. “We want all the people that ‘Star Search’ rejects.” He seems to have gotten them: a male manicurist butchers “Play That Funky Music,” a waitress struggles through “Mony, Mony” and a car salesman gives us “Born to Be Wild” while gunning a motorcycle around the stage. Who wins? That woman in the poodle skirt, the one who also sings her own composition: “I Was Sittin’ and Pickin’ My Navel (When He Waddled BY).”

A double sake, please.